Bigfoot Hunter's Gift Guide: perfect last-minute gifts for your Sasquatch seeker
With loads of television shows dedicated to his capture, a handful of recent documentaries covering his "murder", and even traveling...
With loads of television shows dedicated to his capture, a handful of recent documentaries covering his "murder", and even traveling sideshows that claim to show his body, it's no secret that Bigfoot is bigger than ever, and it seems like everyone is hitting the forest looking for the big hairy dude.
If you've got a Sasquatch hunter on your holiday gift-list, you might find yourself at a loss when it comes to finding the perfect present. Don't worry, we've consulted the oddball experts from Planet Weird who've rounded up twelve killer gift ideas sure to make any cryptozoologist's search for the truth a lot easier.
Forget slogging through the forest like those bozos on Finding Bigfoot. With Cryptozoology experts like Dr. Jeffrey Meldrum advocating research projects that make use of aircraft in the hunt for Sasquatch, now's the perfect time to get your eyes in the sky and off the ground.
Offering smooth aerial footage from nearly half a mile away, the DJI Phantom 2 is not only one of the easiest-to-use consumer drones on the market, it's also one of the most affordable.
Already the gold standard in first-person action cameras (and the perfect companion to the DJI Phantom Drone), GoPro's latest offering is the best yet. Featuring even better low-light performance, incredible 4K video capability, and super-smooth slow-motion, those blurry photos of Sasquatch are a thing of the past.
Maybe. Ok, probably not.
Experts agree that Bigfoot can probably see perfectly in the dark, which puts him one step ahead of you when the sun goes down. Enter the Tracker 1x24 Night Vision Goggles, a night vision binocular that not only allows for incredibly detailed, hands-free surveillance under the cover of night, it looks frickin' badass to boot.
Featuring prolonged battery life, an ultra-lightweight body, and backed by a lifetime warranty, Yukon's goggles will get you the most bang for your buck.
Any Sasquatch researcher worth his salt will tell you that it's not enough to be in the field looking for the world's reigning hide and seek champion - if you want to find him, you need to beat him at his own game. With the Modern Warrior Woodland Ghillie Suit, you'll be so well-hidden that you might even get mistaken for a Bigfoot yourself. Be careful with that kind of power.
You can't be in the woods all the time. When pesky things like work, school, sleep, or family get in the way of your Bigfoot tracking, this game camera as your habituation site covered day and night. At about a hundred bucks, it's also one of the best low-profile game cameras available for the price.
One of the most common concerns we hear from researchers are animal attacks while in the field. Sure, you could carry a gun or two, but for a readily-available, non-lethal defense, look no further than the Warrior Stun Baton by O-mega Star. Packing a whopping 150,000 volts (the legal maximum), it doesn't matter whether you're attacked by wild dogs or the big man himself - they're in for one hell of a wallop.
Written by one of the leaders in cryptozoological research, the Sasquatch Field Guide by Dr. Jeff Meldrum is the perfect reference guide to tracking Bigfoot and properly collecting evidence.
Created to accompany your adventures in Squatching, the highly portable, laminated reference guide lists everything from how to take a perfect plaster foot cast to where to collect potential Squatch scat. It even includes a handy ruled edge for measuring that killer print you just found.
A great gift for the junior Squatcher on your list, the Accountrements Bigfoot Research Kit might skew a bit more on the lighthearted side, but includes everything you need to get started in your search. Log your evidence with the handy notebook, and collect log evidence with the included scat bags. It even includes some yellow ground tags to cordon off your research area. For just over $10, it's a steal.
Fulfill the most basic of Bigfoot hunter needs with a big tub of plaster of paris. Good for casting those monster prints and repairing the crumbling walls of your neglected social life. Kidding, kidding.
There was a time when thermal imaging technology was afforded only to television shows, government funded research projects, or rich friends with more money than sense. Not anymore. With the newly-released FLIR ONE Thermal Imager for the iPhone 5 and 5s, you can record heat signatures in the palm of your hand. The nifty little device clips right onto your smartphone and even acts as a backup battery to reduce power drain.
And hey, at the very least, you and your friends will get hours of fun checking out your farts in predator-vision.
Another of the most basic Squatch hunter needs, Repel 100 Insect Repellent makes a perfect stocking stuffer for the cryptozoologist in your family. It's as basic as new underwear.
If your Bigfoot hunting friend isn't so good at gathering evidence, he can always take route allegedly paved by filmmaker Matthew Morgan and the always-entertaining Rick Dyer: just fake it.
While this bare-bones gorilla costume isn't quite as detailed at the one that Dyer took around the country after he "killed it", your budding hoaxer can grab a cell phone and a buddy and still make national news. Don't worry if the video is blurry. Heck, even if it's crystal clear, you might still make it into a Survivorman special.
Bonus: Watch The Bigfoot Hunter: Still Searching
Still got shopping to do? Check out more rad gift guides!
This was originally written for Roadtrippers, a great resource for anyone interested in travel.
Want more articles by Greg Newkirk? Find them here!