20 places in Kansas City to be a grown ass little kid

Kansas City is the perfect playground for adults. Big kid food, big kid drinks and big kid fun are all over this city. Skip work, clear a weekend or just take an afternoon and get out there to rediscover the grown ass little kid inside who is ready to get out and explore KC.

1. Up Down
Craft beer, pizza, pinball, 80s and 90s wrestling, movies like The Goonies and The Princess Bride, and most important of all: NO KIDS! Well, except for you and your job holding, house owning, fun loving, never grew up friends. Up Down is here for you, and it is a glorious throwback to childhood for kids of the 80s and 90s. Just remember: up up down down left right left right B A start. If you know what I'm talking about, this is your place.

2. Top Golf
Beer and golf go together like beer and golf. This is a good thing, and Top Golf makes it even better by taking the sweating, walking, ball losing and four hours of frustration out of "the old fashioned" version of golf. Beer, food, air conditioning, real sports on tv and not even having to lean over to tee up your ball? Yeah, that's my kind of golf too.

3. Chicken and Pickle
It's like Honey, I Shrunk the Kids at Chicken and Pickle, although there is booze involved too, thankfully. With yard game courts for corn hole, giant versions of Battleship and other tabletop favorites and of course, PICKLEBALL, you can't not have fun at Chicken and Pickle. The food is pretty darn tasty too, but as Billy Joel sang, I'm here "to forget about life for a while" and that means it's play time.

4. Char Bar
Char Bar has great drinks, really good bbq and yard games galore. They also have a swing set that can hold at least 220 pounds, or so I've heard. Whether you're gathering with friends, trying to look cool with the hipster crowd, trying to meet people or some combination of the above, there's something about bellying up to one of Char Bar's picnic tables that just gives you that warm feeling down below (not that far below, champ, we're talking nostalgia of the heart.)

5. Main Event
When you walk in to Main Event, the first two things you see are a zipline course and a bar, which sounds like a good time no matter how you stack it. You can reserve your bowling alley in advance with the handy website, and if it's a full blown party you're trying to organize, they have that covered too. In fact, one of the first questions they ask is whether the party is for kids or adults. I think we know the answer.

6. TapCade
The name says it all: beer and arcade. This is what every parent needs in their life. TapCade is a reminder that you're never too old to have fun, and that fun is even more fun when it involves beer. TapCade: fun+beer= more fun than just about anything else.

7. Rosedale Park
Rosedale Park's calling card is its 36 holes of disc golf. Alcohol isn't technically "allowed" but if some happens to fall into your travel mug, who is really going to care? Rosedale is also home to a great skate and bike park, should the need to recreate your youthful 1980s radness arise.

8. The River Market
The River Market is people watching heaven. It's a also just a great place to kill half a day or so. Eat some food, listen to some music, go look at the river. Taste of Brazil is my pick for the little cheese bread balls that are one of the best hangover cures in town.

9. Breakout
Do you lay awake at night, dreaming of finding your way out of a room that you are trapped in? As long as this sounds more like a dream and less like a nightmare, Breakout's escape room version of fun may be for you. Escape rooms have popped up a lot in the last few years, but Breakout's brazen disregard for claustrophobia has definitely caught on in KC.

10. Alamo Drafthouse
You can drink, you can eat and at special screenings you can sing along, recite lines, get sprayed with water guns and a bunch of other weird crap that matches up in some way with whatever it is you're there to see. It's like the movie theater that encourages assholery, as long as it's approved assholery and you're amongst likeminded assholes.

11. Toy and Miniature Museum
You don't have to like toys, tiny things or even museums to appreciate the artistry and craftsmanship at the Toy and Miniature Museum. Granted, some of the stuff there is just plain weird, but weird in that creepy early 1900s clown toy kind of way, which some of us actually kind of like. Beside that aspect, it's just cool to see the quality and attention to detail that artists have put into handmade objects. And there's the creepy doll thing.

12. Boulevard Beer Tour
Remember when you were a little kid and you found out how babies were made for the first time? I know, it's still kind of weird. The Boulevard tour is like beer biology, except you get to drink the result instead of having to take care of it for 18 years. Pick up a four pack of Bourbon Barrel Quad in the visitor center store on your way out for the only quadruplets anyone wants.

13. Local Pig Butcher/Charcuterie Classes
Remember when you got a little older and actually watched a video in health class of a baby being born and realized that shit just got real? Local Pig's butchering class is kind of like that for food, but if you really want to know how something works and how your food goes from farm to grill, this is the place. Charcuterie and sausage making classes are available for those who still think babies come from a stork.

14. Maps Coffee Custom Roasting Class
I could sit and watch the coffee roaster at Maps swirl beans around its roasting drum and cooling rack for hours, but then I'd have a bunch of burned-ass coffee. Instead, I'd rather have roast-master Vincent show me the ropes and let me name my own special coffee roast in one of his custom classes.

15. First Fridays in the Crossroads
Art, food and booze. It's like recess for adults. Put on your plaid shirt, cuff your jeans, put on your beard oil and zip up your factory distressed boots for hipster paradise in the Crossroads. It really is fun, even if just for the people watching or the chance to see a local emerging artist's newest work and actually be able to afford to buy it.

16. Third Thursdays at the Nelson
Yay, more fun with alliteration! What could go wrong when you combine priceless works of art with booze? The Nelson has proven that the answer is not much, as the people who come to a museum happy hour are the kind who may get a little saucy, but it typically never gets more rowdy than someone who just can't believe how much they LOVVVVVVVVVEEEE this exhibit.

17. Foot Golf at Swope Park
Foot golf is golf the fun way, especially if you like soccer. Basically, you're just kicking a soccer ball into a big-ass golf hole. You're also drinking beer. Unlike real golf, you're also having fun. It's one of the best ways to kill a couple hours on a Saturday afternoon with friends in KC, and you don't need thousands of dollars worth of gear to do it.

18. Moon Marble Company
I never really thought about marbles having to be made. I never really thought about marbles at all, other than really profound thoughts like "Ooooh, this one is pretty." Then I discovered Moon Marble, and I also discovered that marbles are made by humans and not by falling out of a marble tree or something like that. Seriously fun, seriously old school, seriously grown ass little kid territory.

19. Shawnee Mission Park Paddle Boats
The international law of paddle boats is that a 30 mph headwind will develop as soon as you reach your turnaround point. That's ok though, because we're thinking like kids today, and kids don't think about crap like that. Sunscreen, water, ibuprofen and a dry shirt are the only adult things allowed on this cruise.

20. Green Dirt Farm
Green Dirt Farm is the grown up version of little kid heaven. There is a farm, farm animals, farm equipment and cheese for a snack. No powdery neon orange macaroni or individually wrapped sticks here though, this is big kid cheese and it's damn good. Check out the farm and if any spots are available, snag a spot at one of their chef's dinners for a truly grown up snack.

Drew is just a big kid at heart, and Kansas City is one big playground that he has been exploring for years and will keep playing in for years to come.